Saturday, December 15, 2012

The Telugu Movie Traumatization

I am not much of a movie buff.When I was a kid,I used to rarely watch movies and during some point of time , took a pledge not to watch any(However hard I try,I don't remember why).Still ,of the few movies I used to watch,most of them were in Telugu except for the occasional Hindi one and that too ,after I was into my teens and started understanding the language.As for English,the only movies I knew as a kid were Independence Day,Titanic and Speed.

Now,I have been watching decent number of movies in all three languages and feel that I have a decent taste in movies..Not surprisingly,I'm actually put off by Telugu movies and here are the reasons

1)Copy from Hollywood and Still screw it up.

Culprits:Any movie that looks too good to be original.

I recently watched a movie called Julai. There is this one scene in the movie of inconsistencies that I particularly hated.It is a complete rip off of the introduction scene of the Joker from the epic movie -The Dark Knight.

The scene in the original is a scheme where the joker hires people who are experts in one task and he gets them killed once their task is over.So basically use and throw kill.So what does the guy in the rip off do?Take 9 men into the bank to steal,kill them inside and then steal the money.The most important job these 9 guys do in the movie is walk behind the villain when he walks into an empty bank.This is done to project him as highly intelligent.

Lets for a second forget that its a movie.For all I know ,stealing a bank gets you lesser prison time than killing 8 people.Heck,it could actually lead to the capital punishment.So,when in all probability,you can loot the bank alone,why take people in ,kill them and complicate matters?

Another such is a rip off of the comedy Blue Streak.In the movie,The robbers loot a bank in th eoriginal and one of them tries to take the loot by himself.All of the robbers except two of them die.The other guy jumps from one building into the opposite one by using a tight rope and stick the diamond in a air vent.What happens in the telugu version?They dig up a hole in a neatly laid out floor and put their loot there.I mean,if the workers notice someone dug up the floor,the first thing they do is investigate. At least, the director redeems himself as the money is found by some worker in the movie.

The worst adaptation is the movie Varudu,which rips off the climax from X:Men Wolverine.Why the hell were there cooling towers there in agricultural field ? and why would anyone in their right senses climb them to the fight with an apparently powerful villan? 
Have a look at how he rips off a fight between superheroes and places in the Indian context:  

2)The complete ignorance to science, law end everything else.

Culprits:All the action oriented movies. Balakrishna gets a special mention here .

The first thing that should be done to directors of the movies is to get them in one place and teach physics.
Just watch one movie of any popular actor in recent times,and you would see them doing stuff which would make superman jealous. Nowadays, not just flying in air,but fighting them at it,getting head shots with a pistol without even aiming and taking on at least 50 people is something a regular citizen can do if you go by the movies.  

Also there are some other added benefits in the movie.You can go on a shooting spree in full public or possess weapons if you are the hero.Killed dozens of guys and some one or two hot shot politicians who are corrupt?No problem ,Law is only for extras in the movie.

In the final fights,Irrespective of whether the villain has a sniper,bazooka or a ship full of explosives,the hero prefers going physical.Obviously.If mere punch can send goons flying miles away why not show it off more?As if anyone really worries about things like physics.

3)The complete lack of Respect for Women.

Culprits:Almost every movie.

It no big thing that most of the movies released are male oriented.Most of the world seems to do it that way.But it is alarmingly more so in telugu. 

In mainstream Telugu cinema,the main role of the female lead is to look pretty in the first half ,run behind the hero ,dream about him and manage to get captured by the villain.If the movie has some story in it ,the last part is cut off.You can actually run a movie by replacing the lead actress by a doll.Its okay if its one or two movies.But the trend is observed in almost every movie I watched recently.And the industries version of a female oriented movie is where she is shown to be struggling only for some guy to come and rescue her.Its female oriented cause its about her getting rescued. 

While the hero is capable of working ,thinking and outsmarting the villain and winning fights,The heroine is capable only of fawning over the hero.There actually is a movie where the hero slaps the heroine on multiple occasions and she is still okay with it.
Talk about self respect and independence.
In all crunch situations,It is the hero who has to come rescue her.There is actually no movie where the woman helps the guy or at least puts up a fight.

Another interesting trend is that,if the movie shows the actress in some profession,it means that the hero needs some person from that profession in the movie.Lets say if she is a press reporter,I can safely bet that he needs some info or airtime in a channel.If she works in some office,the boss will be a side kick of the villain and has some necessary info.If not so,she will be portrayed as someone who spends all her time shopping and looking pretty.How hard is is to show an independent woman or an entrepreneur who has her own goals?

4)The irritating hero worship.

Culprits:Every actor who has acted in more than 1 movie. NTR,Pawan kind of overdo it.

Apparently this is the reason why people come to watch movies.Right from the beginning to the credits,every character has to praise the hero and by this ,not as a character in the movie but with indirect references to the actor,his relatives and everything.There is this scene is a recent movie where a character takes a wooden cut out  of the lead actor to scare away the bad guys.

There are no lead actors in any movie.There are just heroes. 

Praise the lead actor a few times,Put in some fights to prove his mettle and throw in a cute girl for him to save and one mad guy whose job is to take the most primal weapon any one can find and kill people with it,That makes one Telugu movie.Who bothers with rudimentary details like story or motive?

DISCLAIMER:If this offends you, Let me assure you in the most polite way that I don't really care and do pity you for your apparent lack of ability to comprehend the truth .Just kidding,I know there are some exceptions to the above said trends and there were some good movies. I was just pointing out some dominating traits.